To Keep or Rehome...

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montecarlogirl87
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To Keep or Rehome...

Post by montecarlogirl87 »

I am so torn right now.

I have NEVER not kept a dog for it's life. It goes against every animal-loving fiber of my being.

But Shylah has become a bit depressed since I brought home the puppy.

They run and play outside, chasing each other and playing tug-of-war. But Shylah will eventually get a little annoyed and go lay down somewhere.

Shylah was pretty much attached to either mine or my dad's hip previously. She would lie on the couch with him watching tv, or on her bed next to my computer if I was on it. Now she mostly stays outside, and we almost have to force her to come inside. Because when she does, the puppy's there. And she'll turn around and just go back outside where it's quiet.

Even if the puppy is outside and Shylah comes to us all happy and getting petted, the pup will come in and shove herself up next to you (they're both jealous as hell of each other) and Shylah will just give up and leave.

On the one hand they do play together. And lord knows Shylah was just as much (if not more so) hyper and full of energy at that age. It's not the puppy's fault.

But on the other hand, she was an abusive rescue, and it took a lot of work before she really became the great dog she is with us, and I feel guilty, bringing another dog in. She was here first, this was her home. Maybe she feels like she's being replaced or something. Which is not the case, but even with my dad and I both making a conscious effort to love on and play with Shylah specifically, then the puppy comes barging thru and Shylah is off moping in a corner again. :(

Any advice? :(
Tareena and Shylah and Shota - Orlando, FL
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karenz
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by karenz »

We deal with this issue a little bit as well. My dad's ds is older and is developing some arthritis. She will play a little ball or Frisbee but she certainly doesn't want to play with Xander the demon dog at all. He will try to jump around and bark to get her to play but she gives him a growl and goes in another room to be left alone. I feel bad for her as well because she was here first. But we deal with it. We all spend time with her so she gets attention without Xander. However she does still pout occasionally when Xander is getting attention and she is not. So one of us will give him attention while the other gives her attention.

I will say it has gotten better since Xander has grown up and learned some manners. If I'm loving on her, Xander has learned not to come barge in. I'm not really sure they will ever not be jealous of each other but at least they have learned to respect each other.
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by dogbyte »

Put the pup in a crate for some of the time and give the older dog more one on one time..Pups are time stealers and the older dog often feels it....take time to teach "an old dog new tricks" and then reverse and put the older dog up and work with pup...I wouldn't rehome, just readjust your routine...make you the most interesting thing for both dogs. then as the pup grows up and learns manners type obedience have them do it together....just my side of things...may not work...but worth the try...
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by cordeliandemon »

its a bit of a different sittuation but koda is notoriously jealous about me petting other dogs, she barges in and sits on my feet to steal the attention. when i got demon i didnt want that behaviour so i would semi ignore both dogs while they play (staying neutral) and then give demon some cuddles, if koda started coming over i would completely avoid contact with her and turn around, keeping my back to her/walking away untill she lost interest. i did the same if demon was off being silly and she started coming up to me in a "hey youre mine remember ima just sit on your feet and show demon over there that youre mine and i get cuddles when i demand them" i would do the same turn around/no eye contact thing untill she stopped and something else drew her attention, THEN i would descretely give her some love when she didnt expect it and at random intervals when her attention isnt on me.
its basically worked out that when the dogs are together they know ill cuddle them when i feel like it/when i call them but they have to be polite around eachother or theyll be ignored, koda just stays where she is or minds her own business when i pet demon and he does the same for her.
i know its a hard situation but maybe they just need some more time to figure out the pack stucture?
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montecarlogirl87
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by montecarlogirl87 »

yeah, my dad and I are both trying to make sure Shylah still gets her own attention...but she's pretty much just staying outside

she used to stay inside, with us, for the most part, unless it was nice out and then she'd go lie in the sun, but now with the pup, she goes and lies in the corner of the house/fence, and pretty much stays there unless we go and get her or call her inside

and then when she does come in, the pup of course follows her (cus omg movement I must be involved), and if the door is open and she has the out, she'll turn around and go back outside :/

I still don't know what I want to do, I think I'm gonna wait until after the new year either way, that way IF I decide to rehome Shota, I won't have to contend with people impulse-adopting as an xmas present
Tareena and Shylah and Shota - Orlando, FL
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by Dutchringgirl »

Thalie gets put out a bit when Sadie takes her spot on the couch. I make sure that Thalie is still the queen of the house and I will make Sadie move to give Thalie her spot. Ramp up the fun and make her a priority big time.
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HeatherH
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by HeatherH »

I have had 2 dogs at the same time. It's usually an adjustment. They do get over it. Reading your post does give me thought those because after a while you do think “Hmm how did I handle that"?
We were looking at a female ds rescue on the weekend. My question is always how disruptive will it be to Dutch and Pearl. They come first. Specially, Pearl I don’t want them to gang up on her.
They do get over it and adjust. I’ve never had a problem. You have to remember Rome wasn’t built in a day and you plan to have them for at least 10 years. So it won’t be over night. Changes usually take 3-4 moths and the hierarchy start taking place
My husband had 2 dogs when I brought in my Dal. Two alpha dogs “oh what fun”? All three and Pearl adjusted. His little dog was more submissive.
Pearl would completely ignore I don’t think I saw her for a year. She came around.
Puppies grow up. The only problem you need to watch is he the first dog starts ignoring your commands. Also, try one on one and putting the puppy in his place when you’re petting the first dog.
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montecarlogirl87
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by montecarlogirl87 »

I think they're doing a little better.

I was afraid Shylah was going to become the beta between the two of them because of the way Shota would always shove herself into the situation and the way Shylah would just go off somewhere and lay down, therefore letting her get away with it.

But there's been a couple times when they've been out back chasing each other and tussling and I've seen Shylah run her into the fence or a corner (and hold her there for a minute)...and I've noticed that when I feed them, despite the fact they have two bowls (and neither has ever shown food aggression), the pup will lay down and wait until Shylah finishes and walks away before eating. So hopefully Shylah will continue assert herself.

Dad and I have continued to make sure Shylah has her own time, and if the pup happens to be outside (and out of jealous eyesight) when Shylah is by me, I make sure to give her lots of love...she's been coming inside more the last couple days, not as much as pre-Shota, but it's a start at least.

Shylah is still the only one allowed on the couch, and on occasion, my bed. I went out and bought 2 new beds for them when I brought Shota home, Shylah refused to even step on it, guess she's just a creature of habit. So I brought her old one back in, even worn as it is. I've made it a point that every time the pup sits or lays on it, I physically pick her up and put her on her own. I dunno if she's a little stupid or just stubborn, since she keeps doing it, but at least she's not doing it AS much. And if we're loving on Shylah and the pup gets obnoxious neither dad or I are above pushing her off and putting her in her place and making her wait her turn. I make sure she gets her own pats and cuddles later, so she knows we don't hate her.

The two dogs I had when I was younger (Missee-GSD/Collie and Dayzee-Border Collie) never had an issue and were pretty much buds from the day I brought Dayzee home...but they were also the same age and neither had an abusive background or social issues.

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Tareena and Shylah and Shota - Orlando, FL
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by Raven »

Don't know that I would physically remove the pup from the bed...what is she learning by you doing that, other than she keeps getting Mom's attention? (Not sure that dogs treat beds like kids, where Johnny knows his bed and Suzie knows hers.)

You've been given good advice on the old/new dog situation. The only thing I'd like to add is that while I know your heart goes out to Shylah, it's still new to EVERYONE, and the adjustment may end up minimal--and it seems to be heading that way from the sounds of your last post...and you don't have aggression issues to deal with. That's a good thing.

:)

P.S.: Shyla may be more clever than dejected. Maybe she knows how to get your attention away from the newcomer and it's working out just fine in her opinion. (Kidding...kind of...animals can be cunning... :lol: )
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Re: To Keep or Rehome...

Post by Stacy_R »

The main thing I got from this post is space. The new dog needs to understand space and respect Shylah's (and everyone else's). Teach place for both dogs. Shylah is communicating that she wants her space respected and the only way she can do this is by removing herself from common areas. Teaching both dogs place will help tremendously.
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