Dutch Shepherd Forum

If your DS could talk.

Let's have some fun...Pick an every day incident, or a once upon a time occurrence and narrate it as if your dog was speaking.

Radar: Let's go out back and play
Me: I just got home.
Radar: I know let's go. We always go out back when you get home.
Me: I have to pee first
Radar: NO! Let's go out back and play.
[Scratching on the bathroom door]
Radar: Cmoooooon daddy [whining]
[Leela is jumping up and slamming the top of the door]

After 15 minutes of hard-core fetch:
Radar: [Huffing and puffing]Are we going back out soon?
Me: I need to sit down and relax
Radar: [Huffing and puffing]Are we going back out soon?
Me: Go get some water.
Radar: You might go out without me, I'm following you.
Me: No, I am going over to the couch to relax.
30 Seconds later sitting on the couch - Radar has his head in my lap
Radar: Are we going out now?
[Paws me]
Me: Ouch
Radar: Let's go out and play.
[Paws me again harder]
Me: Ouch
Radar: Let's go out and play
Repeat the above until bedtime

^

This is a tough one. En speaks pretty clearly in her own right. I think the mist common thing she'd say would be "EAT-EAT-EAT-EAT-EAT-EAT" as she throws food down her throat without it touching a tooth.

centrop67 wrote:If your DS could talk.

Let's have some fun...Pick an every day incident, or a once upon a time occurrence and narrate it as if your dog was speaking.

Radar: Let's go out back and play
Me: I just got home.
Radar: I know let's go. We always go out back when you get home.
Me: I have to pee first
Radar: NO! Let's go out back and play.
[Scratching on the bathroom door]
Radar: Cmoooooon daddy [whining]
[Leela is jumping up and slamming the top of the door]

After 15 minutes of hard-core fetch:
Radar: [Huffing and puffing]Are we going back out soon?
Me: I need to sit down and relax
Radar: [Huffing and puffing]Are we going back out soon?
Me: Go get some water.
Radar: You might go out without me, I'm following you.
Me: No, I am going over to the couch to relax.
30 Seconds later sitting on the couch - Radar has his head in my lap
Radar: Are we going out now?
[Paws me]
Me: Ouch
Radar: Let's go out and play.
[Paws me again harder]
Me: Ouch
Radar: Let's go out and play
Repeat the above until bedtime

I will just diddo this for Xander right now. It sounds just like him. Lol. I will post another one when I have more time.

You mean people don't already do this?

Hmmmm.... I'll choose Raider for one.

Raider: (jumps up on table and drops ball in my coffee) Play.
Me: Get off the table. (removes ball from coffee and pockets it)
Raider: (jumps down, does sit pretty) Play.
Me: No.
Raider: (noses around pockets) Gimme ball.
Me: No. You know the rules, don't drop it in the coffee.
Raider: (finds ball) Mine.
Me: No, mine.
Raider: (gently chews ball through pocket) This works.
Me: (shrugs) okay but you put a hole in it, no lunch.
Raider: (chews more gently and tries to lick away spit) Okay.

Now I'll do one for H.

H: (getting a bath) I hate you.
Me: Don't care.
H: I'll pee on your bed.
Me: Do that and die.
H: I'll barf my dinner later.
Me: No double dinners. Let me wash your face.
H: I hate you.
Me: Anything else new?
H: There's a squirrel outside... I hate you for not letting me chase it.
Me: Should be used to it.
H: SQUIRREL.
Me: Doesn't work.
H: BUT MOM IT'S A SQUIRREL LOOK AT THAT TAIL!
Me: I know.
H: BUT BUT BUT MOM! IT'S FLUFFY!
(squirrel runs off)
H: (sighs) I hate you.
Me: And back to square one we go.

Here is Xander on any typical morning:

Xander: (front feet on bed and cold nose in face) Mom get up I'm tired of sleeping.

Me: OK OK, I'm getting up.

Xander: (running to the backdoor) hurry mom I got to pee so bad.

Me: (I let him out. He immediately pees and poops. And then has to sniff every inch of the back yard.) Come on Xander, it's the same as yesterday and the day before and the day before that. Hurry up i need coffee.

Xander: No mom something walked over here I have to check it. And over here, and over here too.

Xander: (After coming in and following me to make coffee, stares at ball on the shelf) OK mom let's play ball.

Me: No Xander I have to have my coffee first. (This goes on for about 15 minutes)

Xander: (picks up stuffed animal toy and shoves it in my lap) play this mom play this.

Me: No Xander I'm drinking my coffee.

Xander: (picks up another stuffed animal toy and shoves it in my lap. This continues with 3 or 4 toys) this one mom can we play this one. How about this one. Fine then I will shake this one viscously as I run around the house.

Me: fine Xander let's go play ball.

Xander: ohhh goodie. (As he Flys to the back door.)

After ball....

Xander: thanks mom I'm tired I'm going to rest now.

5 minutes later as I stand up to go get more coffee....

Xander: (jumps up) ohhh goodie mom we playing ball again.

Me: No Xander take a break.

Xander: (repeats various toys in the lap. Shakes them to death and runs around the house)

This continues for most of the day. However, sometimes the coffee changes to alcohol. Lol